Pain stricken with to much pride

This pain inside me needs to go away
I cant help but wonder why it stays
lingers deep within
Gives me pain that makes me immobile
coils me up in a ball
with no one to comfort me in this never ending brawl
I wonder how I will keep going
and if this pain will ever end
It feels like someone is killing me from within
a knife cutting my organs
dull and rusty
jabbing to a gut wrenching beat
tears slowly stream down my face
that's inevitable with each puncture
something grabbing each slaughtered piece
ripping with impeccable strength
you hear a crack
a broken rib
you hear a shatter
a broken pelvis
crunching sounds make me uneasy
as I scream in torture
now someone fighting me not only from within

bruised where bruises wont appear
oceans filling with each clear salty drop
feeling the hole get bigger and bigger
I try to hold myself together
enclosed in my own arms
Sobbing wanting needing
this tortured pain to disintegrate
each day just putting on a healthy face
a mask that hides
this anguished corpse
Only if someone knew
all the pain I really go through